About Mental Health and Wholeness...

One person I am grateful to know in 2021 is my mental health therapist.

I recently read an article during which the author mentions her therapist and follows that up with "Yes, I see a therapist, and you should, too!" I laughed and thought, "You go, girl!"

While I understand that seeing a therapist is not for everyone, I do believe it is worth every person at least considering.

Could you benefit from seeing a therapist? If you answer yes to any number of these questions, perhaps it is worth considering in 2021:

• Are you a human being?
• Do you have family members who are human beings?
• Do you interact with human beings on a regular basis?
• Are you raising tiny human beings?
• Have you been living through 2020 and now the first 10 days of 2021?
• Do you push emotions down deep into your toes?
• Do you have a history of trauma or abuse?
• Have you ever lost someone you loved?
  
• Do you feel overwhelmed by your to-do list at home or at work?
• Do you have problems with boundaries?
• Are you not sure that you know what boundaries are?
• Would you like help in learning to live the whole breadth of emotions and life?

One of the main things (of thousands, of course!) that first drew me to my sweet husband was his emotional intelligence. Seriously. If you know my goofy and light-hearted Kurt, you may laugh at this. But truly!  He is (mostly!) a wise man. I credit some of this to his decision, in his late twenties, to seek out a therapist for himself. He didn't totally connect to his first or even second therapist, but he kept persevering and did find a great match. I am so proud of young Kurt for doing this. Good job, Past Kurt!

[If you're still reading this and are looking for a funny story about a therapist: The first time Kurt went out to dinner with me and my parents, he secretly pointed to a table next to us and whispered to me: "This is a little awkward, but that's the lady I used to see." I looked over and saw a woman, probably in her mid-sizties, who was beautiful and graceful. I was pretty confused throughout our meal, as I admittedly didn't know everything about Kurt at this point but was surprised he hadn't told me about a much older girlfriend. It turns out 'the lady he used to see' was his therapist. We have come to affectionally call her 'the cougar.']

It doesn't have to be about mental illness, friends. It very well could simply be about mental health and wholeness. 

Not an ad for therapists, just a PSA from your self-care-loving friend!

BEing in 2020.

Teaching the lady to be.

To be:

Resilient.

Resourceful.

Powerful.

Calm.

Steady.

Assertive.

Empowered.

Persistent.

Tenacious.

Dearest 2020:

There are so many things I'd like to say to you, but I will stick with a simple 'thank you.' 

This year, we were forced to become so much more, to be pushed outside of our comfort zone, to press pause and assess what matters most. We have redirected, shifted course, and adapted again. We have waited-- patiently and not so patiently. We have been forced into difficult conversations and decisions. We have disagreed, we have been angry and hurt, and we have persevered. We have trudged on despite the hardships. We have clung to what matters most. We have mourned. We have sat alone. We have stayed inside. We have been creative and adventurous within our limits. We have been benevolent. We have been courageous and selfless. We have prayed and worshipped in our homes. We have cared about the other. We have worn our masks, we have volunteered, and we have fought. We have gotten into necessary trouble. We have worked together while standing apart.

We have rested in ambiguity and unease.

While I was feeling particularly overwhelmed and exhausted in 2015, I started writing more in my journal and in this little blog. I was running around doing all the things, and I just needed to learn to sit and BE. I was quite literally teaching the lady-- me-- to be. And now, five years later, I am blessed with the opportunity to teach three more little ladies to simply be. To be resilient, strong, empowered, tenacious, and persistent. (Among other things, of course! I'm all for compassion, empathy, humility, patience (eek!), and gratitude!)  What a chance I have had-- we have all had-- to practice all these things in the year of 2020. In a year where we can't do much other than simply BE, we have found much more strength within our beings. 2020 is the mascot of 'teachingtheladytobe.'

I am very aware that this process of learning to BE is an ongoing endeavor. Each of us, until we take our last breath, is a work in progress. In the early weeks of 2021, I am planning to reflect more on how I have been stretched in 2020. How have I grown and shown resilience, and how can I best carry these attributes into the new year-- and years/decades-- to come? Of what have I let go? What have I breathed out, and what have I embraced? How can I continue to positively impact my own being, my family, my friends, my community, and my world while simultaneously giving myself rest, grace, and time and space to simply be? What do I need to hug more tightly, and what do I need to kick to the curb in 2021?

Cheers to a new year, a fresh start, and a stronger, more resilient YOU, friend!  I believe in every piece of you.

And SO LONG, 2020. Thank you for teaching us that we are mightier than we think.

Sincerely,

Lizzie